Tuesday, May 28, 2013

boy who wanted to die

Today I almost got out of my car to spank the bottom of a kid who was riding a bicycle in the middle of the street.
There I was, in my car, on my street, going toward the intersection with Main Street. And here came the kid crossing Main Street on his bike in the direction of my street.
You'd think the kid would see my car coming and would steer toward the sidewalk, right? But the kid is not coming my way, the plague.
When I realize that the little pest is in oblivion to the fact that he is about to enter a frontal collision with my car, I decided to move to the middle of the road to give him more space alongside the curb.
What did the kid do? Directs the bike well into the middle of the road, in the same direction that I was!
Oh, brother!
When a car gets a pest like this and kills him, who is to blame? The driver!

But this type of plague is not the only problem infesting the American traffic (or that of anywhere in the world, for that matter)
I am sure you are familiar with the phrase, "You are a special kind of stupid," aren't you?
In Brazil we say someone has entered the stupid queue twice.
This is especially common in traffic.
Last week I turned on the left-turn signal to enter my street. The car in front of me did the same.
We were both slowing down and pulling our cars to the middle of Main street, so that we could turn left.
Then, when the opposite direction cars passed, the guy in front of me turned left and entered my street. ... And, my friend, I say this with all sincerity and awe, the most preposterous thing happened. As he entered the street, he stopped the car - right there - at the corner - as soon as he made the turn.
And there he stood, blocking my entry for almost a minute, while I, in a state of complete shock, tried to understand wtf. When I realized that the creature wouldn't shit nor get off the bush, I decided to touch on my horn.
I said touch! If u consider the state I was in, consider it a miracle that I have not laid my hand on the horn with a passion.
To the sound of my beep, the car just went into motion and into the parking lot of the building on the corner!
Are you freaking kidding me!

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Cleaning time

The best idea I have had in the pasts few weeks is to get up at 5:30 to clean the house.
Why would anyone think such an insane idea is the best idea one has ever had?
Simple, my friend, very simple - I get to have a weekend.
No more spending 3 to 4 hours of my precious Saturday doing housecleaning. It gets done bu Thursday afternoon (because I vacuum in the afternoon on Thursday.
That's it! a clean house all week long and a weekend as a bonus!

Monday, May 13, 2013

Fragile Democracy

Pakistan had their elections this week. It is the first time that one democratic elected government is transferred to another democratic elected government in that country.
That's great. But It wasn't peaceful. Democracy is not easy.
And it is silly to think that it will ever be. Democracy has never naturally emerged and it has never naturally survived anywhere where its citizens are not willing to protect it.
Think about it, America.

Monday, May 06, 2013

Crazy New England

So on last week's Saturday I wore shorts for the first time.

Then in a matter of 5 days we went from early spring to dead of summer, because on Thursday it was past 80 F. How crazy is that?

However, on Friday we went bike riding in the neighborhood and it was freezing!!!!

On Saturday we went bike riding in the bike path. I took my spring jacket just for safety and I didn't even have to put it on. I was hot.

Welcome to New England, everyone!