Welcome back to the dark ages

We are not living in a world of tolerance. We are living in a world where no one is free to speak their minds, because that might offend someone. A famous main character of a TV is punished with suspension because he expressed his disagreeing with homosexual practice! A comedian apologized on his Twitter for making fun of people's accents! Meanwhile in our schools a 6-year-old child is charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate's hand!
We have lived in a civilized world for too long. We are now going back to tribal living. No one is allowed to disagree from the popular opinion - if that happens, we will kick this person out of our tribe, leave him up to die. Welcome back to a world in which free speech does not exist, comedy is not accepted, and disagreeing views are punished with social execration.
Welcome back to the dark ages.

Bed time / Bad time?

Is it just me, or clocks go by way too fast in the evening?
I don't know about you, but making it to bed on time is the number one challenge of my week. What happens between 7 o'clock and 11 o'clock - where those four hours go in the blink of an eye - that is a mystery to me.
Last Friday was Friday the 13, I was planning a nice, cozy, scary night, in bed with my baby. I rented the scary movie a week ahead of time, so that nothing could go wrong.
Just that it did.
We didn't make it to bed till well past 10 pm, which is earlier than what we usually do, but too late if you're trying to watch a movie! And if you know anything about my movie watching abilities, you know that anything after 9 pm is, well, too late for me to stay awake for any significant period of time.
The movie was The Conjuring - the kind of movie that literally scares the soul out of you. Yeah, I was asleep within 45 minutes.
But why, you may ask, did you not make it to bed any sooner?
Well, really how much can you fit into one evening? A trip to Walmart, a little something to eat, getting some searches done in the computer, and getting ready to bed rituals seem to take so much longer than what they should take?
Last night I figured I wouldn't write my blog. I wanted to make it to bed in time to watch an episode of the OC. Really? When I looked at the clock it was already 10pm?
I have a feeling my clocks skip a few hours in their evening marks. 

And you're outraged because...?

So, this lady had a baby and,4 days later, she posted a picture of her sculptural body on instagram, causing almost universal outrage.

To me the real issues are far from what's been freaking out people around the globe. The real issues are - "Is it possible?" followed by "Is it real or photoshop? Or an old picture?"

Now let's go to the issues that are outraging people, and see how senseless and pointless they are:

Issue #1:
"OMG, that will negatively affect young girls, who are already struggling with body and food issues."
...  
:/
Ok.
So if I have a perfect body, I can't show it off, because this will affect people that already have issues with the belief that their body isn't perfect.
H'm ...
So, that turns out great for me. See, as a young girl my face was covered with acne, which forever scarred my skin. To this day I have issues with the way my face looks. I try covering it up with make up, and avoid having pictures taken at certain angles, but the scars are still there. I can't make them go away. I hate them. I hate them. I would love to have perfect skin. But that's impossible.
Does that mean that girls with perfect skin should be forced to cover up their faces with a burka so their heavenly perfect skin won't negatively affect me?
...
I didn't think so.
Also students who get straight A's shouldn't let anyone know about their grades, because that will negatively affect struggling students, right?
...
Yeah, I didn't think so either.
So, why should one have to hide her body because others feel bad about theirs?
(go ahead - shrug)

Issue #2:
"Oh, yeah? Here's a picture of my disgustingly huge tummy 2 months after giving birth! Check out the stretch marks! In your face, b***h!"
...
:/  again.
Ok.
so, if a lady shows off her beautiful body,  I should go ahead and show off my shamefully ugly body to somehow get back at her - as if to say, "Hey, look, I am a normal person, and you're just a freak."
It is almost as hysterical as if, after Superman posts a video of himself saving a little boy from falling in the Niagara Falls, some Joe Shmoke posts a video of himself almost drowning while trying to unclog the toilet, as if to say, "Hey, Superman. I am normal, and you're just a freak."
Or, it is almost as hysterical as if, after the Beatles post a video of themselves performing Yesterday (oh, sorry that was Paul McCartney), some Joe Shmoke posts a video of himself going out of key on Happy Birthday to You, as if to say, "Hey, McCartney. I am normal, and you're just a freak."

Uh, no, honey, you're doing this wrong. ... In the end, by posting a picture of your ugly tummy, what you're really telling young girls is, "See what happens when you have a baby? Don't stop taking that birth control pill!" Don't worry. I got your message. I'm not stopping.

Now, let's get down to what really matters, people.

Issue #1 - Is her picture real and current? Or is it old or photoshopped? if it is real and current, let her show it off. She deserves it. And it is her body, for crying out loud. If it is old or photoshopped, let her freaking show it. Wishful thinking never killed anyone. The problem will be (and I don't know if that is the case)  if she is using that fake picture to somehow promote a product or a lifestyle that is unrealistic. I can agree with anyone that criticizes her on these grounds.

Issue #2 - Is it possible? If it is, "Dang, lady! How do you do that? I can have a baby if you can teach me how to like that 4 days later." I mean, wow. Let me cancel that surrogate mother ad I posted this morning.

Here is a the news piece I read to write this post:
http://servaasschrama.com/2013/12/02/soccer-players-wife-sparks-outrage-in-norway-after-posting-a-sexy-selfie-three-days-after-giving-birth/

Soccer Player’s Wife Sparks Outrage In Norway After Posting A Sexy Selfie Three Days After Giving Birth

Caroline Berg Eriksen, a 26-year-old Norwegian fitness blogger, ignited a heated debate about body image after posting a selfie picture on Instagram three days after giving birth.

Berg Eriksen is married to Norwegian Premier League player Lars-Kristian Eriksen. They had a baby daughter on November 25th.

Three days later, she posted this picture on Instagram with the caption, “I feel so empty and not 4 days after birth.”

The backlash was swift.

Norwegian writer Suzanne Aabel responded with a takedown of the picture for the publication Dagbladet, with the headline, “I feel fat because Soccer Lady has given birth.”

Aabel’s argument is that the picture sets unrealistic expectations for the young women who read Berg Eriksen’s popular “Soccer Lady” website.

She wrote:

“I think it is dangerous. I work with 16 year old girls. They struggle with body and food at some level all together. And they look up to famous people, as adults we almost forgot that we did as teenagers.”

(…)

“Over 70 percent of young women are struggling with low self-esteem and body contempt because only people who look like that here like posting pictures of themselves half naked four days after birth.”

Norwegian politician Gry Larsen spoke out as well, posting a picture of her own stomach on her Facebook with the caption, “Two months after birth #NormalLady.”

She wrote a column for Norway’s largest newspaper, Aftenposten, explaining that she wanted to bring “balance” the way the girls should view the post-baby body.

Real life terrors

Last week one of the topics discussed by one of my college groups was horror movies and why we watched them ( or not ) .
I never remember how to begin our discussions , but they always end up being fun.
One of my students said her daughter loves to watch horror movies, but then has nightmares .
I like horror movies too. But I rarely have nightmares. What happens to me is a little different . The movies stay in my head and whenever a similar situation happens I get paranoid. It's not fear. Like, who's afraid of the dark? Of course I'm not afraid of the dark . But after spending an hour and a half seeing ghosts appear out of nowhere in the dark , a trip to the washing machine (which is in the basement ) after sunset, is a little freaky. And when I have to leave home to teach at the college! I go out the back door and have to walk along the side of the house in the dark until I get to my car, which is parked in front of house. "It's just a movie, Vikinha, it's just a movie, " I keep saying to myself.
Now that I have a normal teaching job and I can come home at 3 in the afternoon, I spend my afternoon planning classes with Netflix on horror movies. I need the background noise so I can work, but the side effect is an overdose of terrifying images that are impregnated in my head. A day doesn't go by in which I don't have a fright .
Lately I've seen some movies of people get stuck in elevators. In my building , in Brazil , we had an elevator . The elevator was stuck frequently, and I have stayed stuck several times, but nobody ever got stuck for hours . Pretty soon someone from maintenance came to get us out. But I always heard stories of children who died with the severed head or cut in half, because they tried to leave on their own.
The truth is that in many elevators around the world people get stuck for hours or days. The stories I've seen in movies have much of these elevator terrors, but with the aggravating factor that someone always has a terrible secret. I'll never get into an elevator with a peace of mind again.

And although I always remember that everything is just a movie , suddenly a terrible accident like what happened with Paul Walker yesterday reminds me that not everything is just a movie. Real life is really full of terrors. And we are all just too lucky to make it to the end of the day alive. We're just beating the odds, aren't we?
Creepy.

I can't figure out this crazy idea of having babies

http://www.healthydunia.com/article/1285/27/common_pregnancy_woes.html

The farther I get into my marriage, the more I fear the idea of pregnancy. I am supposed to start taking pre-natal vitamins. I have bought them. They are on my kitchen counter top, staring at me. I haven't touched them yet. I am freaked out.
I need to be completely honest and say that every time I hear people talk about all the misery of pregnancy and child-birth and child-rearing, and then put an idiotic smile on their faces and say it is all worth it, I can not help but think they sound pathetic.
Seriously, do people turn stupid after they had children? So you go through nine months of misery, plus the pain of labor, plus the endless sleepless nights with a crying baby that can't say what it wants, plus the fact that your body will NEVER be the same again, so that what? Your child can grow up and treat you like you treated your parents? Really? Is that what you want for your life? If human beings had any sort of self love they would not procreate.
On top of it, this child will blame you for everything wrong that happened in his life, while everyone else will talk about how their children would never get away with that. 
Oh, let's not mention sex. How often to post-baby couples have sex?
People say you should take advantage of it now, because you won't have much of it after the baby. Hold it, buddy! Are you trying to talk me into it or out of it? I love sex. I actually don't think I love anything more than sex. Maybe potato chips. And I already don't have enough of it. I don't need an aggravating factor to my already pitiful sex life.
I am quite honestly hoping for God's mercy to not allow me to bear children. This way I don't have to give up my body - which has never been a top model body to start with -, my trips, my life, but I don't have to be the one making that decision.

Electricity

Yesterday I read a post from a friend. It was named "13 Skills Your Grandparents Had That You Don’t".
It was funny, but sad to realize that we have lost so much in so little time. And when you start thinking about it more deeply, how much we have lost of what our race has achieved and passed down for centuries.
Maybe our parents were right when they called us generation X, but our parents are also to blame for not passing down (because they themselves didn't value) the things they learned from their parents.

I started thinking about this when we had that killer Halloween storm 2 years ago and people were freaking out - most of us didn't know how to live without electricity - those who did did it kicking and screaming, not worried about expressing their anger.

It is scary to admit that but the countries like America (and countries like Brazil to a lesser degree) have lost the ability to live without electricity. Seriously - if, like  in the shows Revolution and American Blackout, suddenly power went out, and no one knew how to bring it back on - how many of us would have no idea of what to do?
To start with, most of our data - the kind we know how to use - would be gone. Most of our menial daily activities would not be able to be performed. Most of our food would rot. How many of us would survive?

The simple population that lives in the wilderness would. Those of us, city dwellers, so full of our arrogance and our progress, would probably all be dead in a few weeks - of exposure, starvation or just violence that would sprung from our own despair.

Isn't it sad how much of 5 millenia of progress we have lost (or abandoned) in less than 2 centuries of electricity?

The danger of Xmas cards

Saturday morning my Christmas cards arrived. Well, then I put myself to work in the dangerous task of enveloping Christmas cards. The worst part of preparing the Christmas cards is the dangerous manipulation of envelopes.

What? It's too early to worry about Xmas cards? Not really. I consider this an achievement. Previously I considered ordering cards before Christmas a feat. Now the feat is to order the cards with enough time to send them to Brazil. Maybe if I send them tomorrow, they get there before Christmas. No, friends, when it comes to sending things to Brazil, nothing is too early. Send them three months in advance and pray that they get there this year. If they ever even get there.

But as I was saying, the worst part of preparing the Christmas cards is the dangerous manipulation of envelopes. Yes, envelopes are extremely dangerous tools. And its rampant handling during the holidays is a threat to the physical integrity of people who manipulate them.
Tongue, lips and fingers, are all showing different sorts of damage caused by renowned paper cutting.

Paper is a very powerful sharp object . It cuts with such power that is requires only a slight rubbing of the cutting part of the paper on the skin in any unwary user.
The worst part of it is how much it hurts . The paper cut hurts like misery. I've cut myself with a razor blade before...

I am here obliged to clarify confusion in the boys' minds. Yes, women also use razors, guys! Surprised? Thought we only used Veet or wax? Okay, some of us even use those, but there are parts of our body that we can not go in and wax, and I would not dare use Veet. Then what do you do? How do you guys think we do to stay smooth? I can guarantee to you guys it is not because of our Indian blood. Most girls you know do not have much of that Indian heritage. In my family, to my disgrace, indigenous heritage was left there with my grandmother. The hairs that do not ever whiten, the skin that never gets old... My family turned white, and with whiteness came all the setbacks of the white race. The worst thing is not it... I was also left with the setbacks of the black race - the kind of stink that only black people have. yes, the setbacks of my rich colorful heritage was all that was perpetuated in my genetic make. I feel sorry for my future children - they will only inherit the trash of my mixed ancestry.

But I must confine myself to the subject of the razor . The question is - since most of us are not Indians - except on April 19 - shaving is necessary. So I have had my share or razor cuts. And I can say without fear of error that the paper cut is more painful than the razor cut.

from the bottom of the toy chest

This one came from the bottom of the toy chest. I was watching my soap opera from hell - the one that condones homosexuality and free sex... "Wait, " you say. " Which one ? All of them condone homosexuality and free sex. "

...

:/ < - My face looking back at you after what you said.

Okay. You won. So I was watching my 7 o'clock soap opera from hell , and remembering the days when you could still let the kids watch the 7 o'clock soap opera (today not even of 6 o'clock soap is safe any more...)  It was then that I also remembered the funny way we organized shower time at home.

At home we showered by commercials. You 'd have to be ready to enter the shower, by the bathroom door, wrapped in towel, waiting for the commercial break. Did the first block end?

"TV off! TV off! Quick to the shower! Hurry so we don't miss the start of the next block!"

And that shower was a rushed one. The whole family waiting for you to end the shower, so they could turn the TV back on. And when u turned off the shower, you'd shout from in there "I'M DONE!" So others could watch the next block of the novela. And if you wanted to watch it too, you'd run out of the bathroom, towel wrapped around your body, to the front of the TV.

Meanwhile, the next in line was already undressing, moving toward the bathroom door, to get ready for the next commercial break.

And so were the showers at home - from break to break, so we didn't cause a power outage. Whether it was truth or superstition, I do not know . Nowadays we do not do that anymore .

Memories of my childhood ... This was a good one.
I told this story to my husband and he burst out laughing - "What a terrible electrical system, huh!"

Evil evil Charlotte

Right outside my house door lives a monster - a huge ugly scary spider my husband refuses to kill, despite my constant begging and crying. He calls her Charlotte and he says she's our friend.
Our friend? I have no friend named Charlotte! I have never had a friend named Charlotte. And if I do ever have a friend named Charlotte, I will have her name changed to Carla.
I once read the story of Charlotte to my students at school. At end I asked them how they felt. So in return they asked me how I feel.
"Me? You don't want to know."
"Come on, Mrs. Winters."

"Fine. I am glad she is dead. I wish she had died before she the chance of making all those babies. If I ever find one of them, I will crush them under my feet. Spiders don't deserve to live."
The kids laughed. The kids of today are not as sensitive as the kids from Charlotte's day I guess.
Then we watched the movie, and I cried like a baby at the end. And the kids were like, "But, Miss, we thought you didn't like spiders!"
"Well, yeah, kids, it's a movie, ok!!!"

Goodbye, goodbye, see you someday.

Whenever September Ends I get one wanting more in the mouth.

The Big E Fair makes me so homesick. Do I miss the fair itself? Not so much. I like going to the fair to see people, see novelties, walk, go on rides (which I haven't yet, because I never remember to bring money for the tickets, and also bc my husband - who is always my date - does not like to go on toys (where's Léa Sylvia at a time like this?)

But the most nostalgic for me is the food.

I wish I could go back two weeks in time and buy one more cheese curd. Just another smoked salmon, plus a lobster sandwich, plus a Maine baked potato, just another little snack ... I miss it!!!

sick as a dog

IN my last post I talked about the un-lived life.

If anyone is wondering why I have been absent from my blog for the past week - I have been sick and I have been working like a slave to get all my lessons ready in time. Talk about un-lived life.

Next semester I might quit my college classes.

I had to cancel the classes I was registered to take, because I just had no time for them at all.

I also haven't started my language lessons or my guitar lessons, just because I can't find the time.

I am trying to find time to cook and do groceries ... after all we have to eat. I guess ...

Well, bot all is lost.

Baby and I have done 2 Big E dates where we ate like we have a hole in our stomach, and discovered a new sushi place.

We also went to see a scary movie and took a few drives to see land. I am not sure we are ever going to buy anything, but we are looking at a lot of them.

Un-lived life

The only certain thing in life is that we are going to die - and yet we live our lives as if this would never happen. Worse - we live our lives without having fully lived. When death comes to you, what will there won't be an extra minute to finishing up the unfinished life; there won't be an extra day to do the things you left for later. Nothing can be worse than meeting death without having truly lived.

(thought about that after watching a novela where this young lady finds out she only has 6 months to live. Made me think of my life, and what if that happened to me? What would I have to claim as my life really?)

Love my high heels and my new job

It's been a week and a half into the school year and I don't hate my job and don't dread going back to work. That feels so good! So different from my previous job that I almost feel like I am in heaven.

I also feel great about the fact that I am in a job where I can dress up and wear my high heels. I LOVE wearing high heels. The only caveat is that after 12 hours on top of those 3-inch tall things I want to throw them out the window. The solution is easy - don't spend the whole day out. I go to school in the morning, come home, then go to college in the evening.

It has been crazy, still, but I am getting my routine down, step by step.

A man must travel

This is why there is a blog called www.vikastraveldiaries.blogspot.com

“The one thing that would have been worse than to be cold floating up and down the waves south of the Indian Ocean, would have been not having made this far, or never having left the warm and comfortable waters of Paraty – even if only to find out how warm and comfortable they were. I felt oddly well as I sailed around the ice that was so far away from home. Today I understand my father. A man must travel, on his own, not through stories, images, books or TV. He must travel himself, with his eyes and feet, to understand that which is his. So that one day he can plant his own trees and value them. He must know the cold so the can enjoy the heat. He must feel distance and displacement, so he can feel well under his own roof. A man must travel to places he doesn't know to break the arrogance that makes us see the world the way we imagine it, instead of simply the way it is or could be; the arrogance that makes us be teachers and doctors of things we have never seen, when we should  be instead students, simply going and seeing.” Amyr Klink (Endless Sea)

Woman vs Cat

Day 1
Decided to attempt putting that baby gate thing on the door.
Directions called for tools and holes on the door frame. But, as I thought, the gate was up and firmly held with no tools or holes on the wall.
Cat was a bit freaked out about it.
Husband guessed Cat would jump right over it.

Day 2
Cat didn't try to jump.
By 1 the morning she made a fuss about it, crying and whining.
At around 1:30, husband gave in and let cat in the room.
Tonight,  husband will not be sleeping at home. I will try it alone.

Day 3
This cat is a f***ing psycho! She whined all f***ing night.
You'd think she'd give up and sleep on the bed I've set by the door. Wrong! It was 7 am and she kept on whining! Weirdo! Wacko! Psycho!
Now she is fast asleep on the living room couch. Getting rested to haunt me tonight, I suppose.

tech clueless

A friend from work  seems to think I am some sort of techonology genius. That is because I am always helping her figure out some tech glitch in her iPhone or computer ...

The thing is: Most times I have no idea what I have done...

She goes like, "Wow! How on earth did you do that?"

I look back at her with a blank stare ... "I just moved my finger around."

Truth is, I get a lot of things done in the computer, but most of the times, if you ask me how I did it, I will have to say I have not a blipping clue.

ESCALATORPHOBIA

Is this a made-up word?

Sorry, maybe it is, but that is what I call what I have.

And how relieved I was this past trip to Brazil when I noticed that grandma has a little bit of it too. So does my best friend Lua.

You can tell when someone has it: 

They stop and hesitate right before going on the escalator, 

they evaluate when to take the first step carefully,

 and, upon nearing the end of the trip, 

they focus all their attention on the exiting process.

ESCALATORPHOBIA

Once when I was little, I was at the mall with mom, and, out of the blue, I froze at the top of the escalator. Mom took off and I froze. 

My brain was going like:   "How again do I do this?"   While I stood at the top and ... began to cry.

Yup,

ESCALATORPHOBIA

ADHD is a pain

It is frustrating to realize that you're talking to someone and have no idea what the person is saying, not because you do not remember, but because something she said made ​​your mind travel to Mars.

Luana always used to complain that I never paid attention when she talked to me. But, yes, I did ... for about 30 seconds. Then I flew away.
"Vika! Pay attention!"
"Hi! Paying attention, dammit!"
But, really, Luana can spit more words per second than I can ... No son of God can handle that.

It is also frustrating to read a book and go back to the top of the page a thousand times. Because you read everything not paying attention to anything - or paying attention to everything, even the thing which is not there, but found its way into your imagination while your eyes saw the words in the book.

Welcome to my world.

Always wondered how all my classmates knew about the science fair, except for me? "When did Ms. say that? Where was my mind?"

And everyone went crazy whenever I changed the subject all the time? Went crazy? My husband would put this verb in the present.

Self-diagnosed? Yes, but I'm almost 100% sure I have ADHD.

airport sorrows

In June I traveled to Brazil on my own - carrying a backpack and a small hand suitcase.
And there I was, feeling sorry for myself because I had to go in the bathroom carrying 2 hand-luggage with me, when I saw a mother of four young kids leaving the bathroom - trying to keep them all under control.
That's when I realized how good I had it.

time to go back

There is not a single time that the plane takes off from Salvador that I don't cry like a baby.

How can I not? How can I not look down at the place where I grew up and see it disappear down below without letting my emotions take the best of me. 

I never cry in front of my family. I hold back as much as I can when we are saying goodbye. 

But I just can't help it when I look out the window and see everything being left behind. My beach. My people. My friends. My family... Everything I chose to leave one day. ...