Things seem to not have meaning anymore. I sit alone at home and I am not sure what is going on. Too much time in my hands, too many things I would like to do. No one to share all of these. My boyfriend seems to be the only person I can count on, for everything. Isn't there something wrong with that?
I don't have co-workers or classmates or students. I don't have a group of friends at church, the one place I always thought of as the place I'd meet my best friends - I don't feel like I belong there. The only church related thing I have been doing lately is tithing. I don't even feel like I am serving God. It gets really lonely when there's no point in anything. Even my dreams, that were always so real to me, are getting foggy and distant.
It was never meant to be like that.