Thursday, December 28, 2006

C-mas gift

My baby gave me Paul McCartney 2005 tour DVD for Christmas and I am so loving it!!!!

Meaning

Things seem to not have meaning anymore. I sit alone at home and I am not sure what is going on. Too much time in my hands, too many things I would like to do. No one to share all of these. My boyfriend seems to be the only person I can count on, for everything. Isn't there something wrong with that?
I don't have co-workers or classmates or students. I don't have a group of friends at church, the one place I always thought of as the place I'd meet my best friends - I don't feel like I belong there. The only church related thing I have been doing lately is tithing. I don't even feel like I am serving God. It gets really lonely when there's no point in anything. Even my dreams, that were always so real to me, are getting foggy and distant.
It was never meant to be like that.

Monday, November 27, 2006

Meu erro

"...e o meu erro foi crer que estar ao seu lado bastaria..."
Meu erro foi crer que você era diferente. Mas você é igual a todo mundo. Você não tá nem aí que nem todo mundo. Só que você me fez acreditar que era meu amigo. Eu realmente ão precisava disso. Você não pode realmente achar que isso é amizade, né?

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

all gone

Now the leaves are all gone from the trees. they will not come back till spring. So that is what the trees will look like till March. Bare. I will miss the green.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

till morning

I had seen it happen before. Something was killing people, it was some sort of curse. Turning them into living dead. And it was in a small town, in the middle of nothing.

I had fled to another town and it was dusk when I got to the woods nearby. Some people came too. As we heard pretty much the same thing I had heard before, I knew it was going to happen again.

I tryied to warn the few people that were with me but they did not believe me. So instead of staying to see what would happen for that dreadful night, I figured if I stayed away from the crazy dumb crowd that likes to get killed by mesterious forces I would just check myself into a hotel nearby and wait till morning. Every curse goes away by morning, right.

Morning came too late.

Some one had seen me running down to the hotel. there were two ofthem only in that small town. I got to one of them and there were already people there to see the phenonmenon. What were they dumb?

The rooms were not exactly private. for each apt you had a common den and then doors to some 9 suites. That wasn't good. I knew it like to go after gatherings of people. The folks in my apt were friendly, but I knew that if we stayed awake it would soon come after us.

I saw myself of to my suite that ...had no wall separating me from this room were a mother and her little boy were staying!?!?! What a cheap prick gave me the key to that room! I had asked for a room not a freaking dorm!

But before I could get to bed, the thing hit the hotel. "It is here!" some one hollered. but there was no need, we heard the screams. getting out of there was hell, but I made it - not unnoticed though.

I tried checking into the hotel next door, but they were all dead. So I ran. The freaks chasing me up and down the cobblestone roads. I found the store of a man I had met in the hotel. He and his only employee were hiding there and I begged for mercy. He let me in and locked the gates back.

But it found us. It came through the gates. There was no hope left. And morning never came.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

a girl's brothers

Anyone still doubt that I am madly in love with my brothers?

Even though the older one drives me insane some times with his crazy theories "about life and love and other mysteries"(eg. politics)?

As much as I tend to be attracted to guys that remind me of him, he is the most unique guy on Earth. I really admire that kid.

A lot of times we disagree. Some times I just do not seem to grasp his thoughts. Sometimes I think he is just being childish. I remember the days when I was the one that would put ideas in his mind. Those days are over. he is the one who tries to put ideas in my mind - I feel that I know so little when he starts talking to me.

As for the little one, having missed his past 2 1/2 years, I can just hope that he becomes quite a man. He has a great role model. His brother has been putting him in the right track. Including movies - Matrix, Lord of the Rings, Star Wars (books and movies). And he is really smart, fun, and sweet.

He looks up to me too. For how long will that last? And why on Earth does he think I am so great? ...

I always indulged him in boyish things. Gross songs, candy after hours, gifts ( I am always trying to get him the gift that will make him forget everyone else's, and I am usually right) And we had lots of fun making fools out of ourselves last time I was there. He just hasn't yet lost that innocence which makes him not mind looking silly. He has a playmate in me, for I have no sense of ridiculous.

What am I to say?
I am just in love with those guys!

Who actually believes Heather Mills?

She wants his money , isn't that obvious?

Who actually believes that Paul McCartney, the sweetest, cutest, hottest man on Earth would have actually abused her? Stabbed her?????? IS SHE OUT OF HER FREAKING MIND?????

Ah, if only Paul had listened to his children and not married that 49er, GOLD DIGGER!!!!

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

The Die Hard Trio

I am not really sure how to start this posting... I would like to do justice to what it really is about, but anything I think of saying sounds too vulgar...

It was Beta, Lua and Vika - the Die Hard trio... not a musical trio, someone called us that bc we were inseparable three friends.

Our friendship was the most special thing that ever happened to me.

We met at age 14 (Beta was 13), I was living in a different city, bc mom had moved to her hometown with us. Those were crazy years, there was so much was going on, and we felt like we had so much in common, and yet each one of us was so unique.

We shared the love for the Beatles and... for a few guys... hahaha.
We shared our non-stop talking habit, our being always late for everything habit, and our lack of tolerance for our mistakes in other people than ourselves habit.
We shared friend jealoussy, the kind that gets possessive; hang out places; non-conformist philosophies of life; a passion for long psychlogical explanations for every single thing we did (...yeah... let's face it, we were a little weird).
And so much we shared, in those years that seemed to last forever.


Whatever happened to those years? Whatever happened to us?


On the year I turn 27, I realize that I still feel 16, that I still refuse to believe that " best friends " is something that is only for children, and that today I have this huge hole in my heart in the place that once belonged to that friendship.


" What happened? " Some one would ask. " 'The apple has gone bad'. that's what happened." I don't know how or why, it just happened.

We never meant things to be like this, but as I said, we thought those years to be everlasting. And they were not.

Today it is only Lua and I. Whatever happened to Beta? No one really knows. "she just decided to leave," is what I 'd rather think, but it is never just the simplest, easiest reason.

So it is only Lua and I, but even so, I have left as well. Distance has not overcome our friendship, but it has changed it in a way we probably never meant it to be changed.

I want to say that Lua and I will always be best friends. But how much will it change? What will it mean? How much has it changed already?

I am still ridiculously jealous of her. My friends know I am jealous, but Lua has certainly experienced the worst of it. And I still repeat the same words I have said 10 years ago... time will pass, boys will come, life will happen, but our friendship will remain forever.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

The Freaky Inn

Wow, I just woke up and here I am trying to make the dream I had make sense.
There were some dead kids in it and... it was like a (whatelse is new) like a movie. It was a bit like those scary movies in which a bunch of people get themselves in trouble, but it was smarter, bc there was actually some mystery that had to be solved.

Ok, Dean, and I, and Jim, my aunt Lea, Marcus, and my little brother JP, who is 9.

I wonder why such a crazy crew got put together. Dean is my boyfriend. Jim is one of the best friends I have here in the U.S. . Auntie Lea is my favorite aunt. JP, I miss him more than life. But how did Marcus get in the story? Maybe bc he's been posting idiotic messages in the e-group; the guy is smart , can't deny that, but lately he's been a pain (in case you are reading this blog , Marcus, gee, sorry, man, but , but, but your emails are really sounding a little annoying, and I honestly got tired of arguing since you don't ever seem to see my point).

Anyway, it was the day before Brazilian independence day. We had to go in this really old house. Apparently it was my idea. It was kind of an inn, and we had to spend the night there before Independence Day. I remember going into everyone's room to see what they had and I did not. (that sounds like me , doesn't it? "Why do you have a brand new air conditioner here and I don't?" "Why does your bedding feels nicer than mine?" Why is it that the grass is always greener on the other side, eh! )

But the inn was quite freaky. And someone pointed out that this was the same inn where, years ago, some kids had died, 2 boys and a girl around 10 to 12 years old. And it seems like the girl's body was missing. No one ever found out why.
"Let's find it out." I said. "Let's go see the children."
Well, the way to the basement was blocked, but we did find our way down there, and found the two boys. We began to put the pieces of the puzzle together and found out how the kids got killed. Now, in my dream it made perfect sense... just that i do not remember it anymore. But the story was so freaky. Some crazy man, some sort of revenge or madness... Gee I really really do not remember. Some wild animal...? ... Now I am losing the thread.

But I was so upset because the girl's body was missing. "We have to find her, so she can rest in piece."

We went around the house getting clues and getting into traps, and we did find the girl's body, which I wanted to bury, but the rest of the gang said it wasn't right. I think my aunt said that. She had to be put with the other boys. "They all died together, they have to all stay together in death," something creepy like that. It made sense to me though. "Let's do it, guys!"

See, there was something about this girl that I really identified with. I think it was the fact that she was the only girl in a group of boys. That was always the case with me - it was always the boys and I. I remember my grandma complaining about that when I was little; she kept saying how I did not behave like a young lady. Gee, me - young lady? Let's face it... uh... no, never been one, always a tomboy.

So, to me she was a little version of me, and the more we found out about their tragic adventure, the more I thought how similar that was to the bunches of adventures my friends and I had wanted to get ourselves into. I sort of wanted her not to be dead. When we did find her body, I was heartbroken. That was not fair. And yes, there was some weird link between the two of us, bc I felt and saw weird things that led to our understanding their death.

"Let's get this over with."
We took the little girl to the basement and put her with the 2 litte boys, and I remember saying, "no child should have to die like that. They did not even know what killed them."

I started crying and Dean hugged me, and I think Marcus said we should get out of there asap, so no one would know we had gone there. No one? No one dead or alive? I think there was some haunting twist to the story, cuz I remember sort of feeling these cold shivers and we would be like, "what was that?" and sort of hoping that there was no curse related to it, or that their killer would not come after us... something crazy like that.

We ended up going to Jim's room... or JP's room? Whatever. We sat there and ate treats till we fell asleep. My guess is that we were all too scared to leave the room, bc I remember we were all talking about what would happen from then on, and how we should leave as soon as the sun was up, and all the time we were like "where's JP?" "Did you hear that?", and making nervous jokes, and, in the morning, when I opened my eyes, the lights were all on. Everybody had fallen asleep in the exact same position they were since the moment we walked into the room, no one had dared to move a muscle.

I woke up and saw that outside there was bright sunshine.

"Come on, people, come on, it is time to go! We will miss the parade!"

My aunt, Jp, Marcus and I grabbed a bunch of BRazilian flags and left the Inn. We took my car. I remember my aunt commenting on what a cute little car I had. Dean and Jim did not come... of course... Brazilian independence day. I don't know where they went, but we would meet them later somewhere else.

I guess that was it.

Friday, July 07, 2006

Simplified Spelling?

I was just readingthis article about the puch for simplified spelling. Tha article talks about the pros and cons of a more phonetic spelling, and about the movement in favor of a reform in English ilogical spelling.

It is an amazing topic to discuss, and I believe there are many advantages to a simpler spelling,but I have to agree with one of its opponents when he says that it is too much trouble for what it is worth. It is too much trouble because you cannot simply push a spelling reform down a people's throat. That would end up consfusing everyone's mind. Spelling changes happen naturally and gradually.

Radical changes only confuse the learners who are working hard to understand and solidify the rules they learned and are getting used to them, and the speakers of the language who already have an established idea of how sounds and letter combinations work. For instance donut instead of doughnut, thru instead of through. These changes were not imposed by a reform, some people just started using them and today they are pretty much accepted. They are not official spellings yet, but they are accepted and easy to understand at a first glance. They usually start entering dictionaries when they start being accepted in the academic world and used by writers.

A radical reform would confuse because it would simply disrupt the way people are used to reading and thus make the act of readig anything a task of decyphering phonetic sounds. Just pay attention to what happens when a child who is learning how to spell brings the grown up a piece of paper with a few letter jotted down - we have a hard time figuring out the words, because our eyes will look for the system we have in our minds.

Besides, pronounce changes from place to place, from state to state, from north to south, we all know that. The kids that are learning how to spell, will often spell using their region common pronounce. Which pronounce would be the offically chosen one massacrating and terminating all others in a very unfair elitism?

Language is something that belongs to the people, and it changes with the people. It can not be legislated upon by a small group, changed as pleased, and then announced as the "new way". CHanges happen, since the natural tendency of all of us humans is to simplify our language. it is the case with internet lingo (u, bc, r), it is the case with words that are not used anymore for being too long or too clumsy, it is the case with certain irregular past tenses and plurals. That happens in any language, as we have a lot of this in Brazil too. Just like spoken language changes, so does written language, but in a slower pace, keeping track of the past. Written language is language's way to save its history.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060705/ap_on_re_us/simpl_wurdz

Sunday, June 18, 2006

McCARTNEY and the magic age! Happy Bday , Paul

So today Paul finally turned 64.
"will you stsill need me, will you still feed me, when I'm 64?"
Yes, Paul, absolutely. Too bad that "now that [you're] alone again", I'm not living in Liverpool.
Gee I know, 64 years old, it is kind of sick of me to say that, but "I'm so in love with you".

Sampling the Engineers

Hey, mom, I've got a car. For a long time that was all I wanted to have. And hey, mom, I have a boyfriend too. And for a long time I thought that was all I wanted to have.
But hey, hey mom, something got left behind. For a long long time I knew exactly what I had to do.
But now out there, everyone is an island, miles and miles and miles away from anywhere... in this land of giants, where they sell lives for diamonds, where their youth is a band in a fastfood tv commercial.

weekend in the park by Racionais MCs

They would also like to have a bike, and that they could see their dads jogging, just like athletes; they'd like to go to the park and have some fun, and that someone would teach them how to drive. But all they want is piece and even that is a dream.

Friday, May 19, 2006

I believed

Once upon a time I believed in a lot of things. And I believed things did not have to be the way everyone said they were supposed to be.
But, in the end, what I believe does not really matter.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

PAUL McCARTNEY is mine! Luana, stay away from him!

PAUL McCARTNEY DIVORCED THAT GOLD DIGGER CRIPPLE ANTI-MINE MILITANT WHAT'S HER FACE!!!!!!!

I KNEW IT !!! I KNEW IT!!!! HE IS IN LOVE WITH ME!!!

DO NOT BELIEVE MY BEST FRIEND IF SHE SAYS HE IS IN LOVE WITH HER!!! Luana, stay away from him, he has always been in love with me!

http://people.aol.com/people/articles/0,19736,1194872,00.html

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

"She said"

"she said" is a Beatles song. She knows what it is like to be dead.

"toda a felicidade da vida eh pouca se nao for dividida" (all the hapiness in the world is nothing if it is not shared). Here I am, in the wealthiest country in the world, starving for lack of friendship. Having left my friends behind for a dream, what have I really gained? I am only 26 and I feel like my life is already over. "She said, I know what it's like to be dead."

Thursday, April 27, 2006

If you visit my blog regularly you'll find something new that I had accidentally saved as a draft before my car accident. Now I finally published it. I was away from bloggin for a while bc of the accident that happened on ... Hey! Who are you???? Let me write !!!!!! I have an obbligation to my readers!!!!!

DUE TO CONTRACTUAL OBBLIGATIONS, THIS NETWORK, I MEAN, THIS BLOG, IS NOT ALLOWED TO REPORT ON THE ACCIDENT THAT HAPPENED TO THE AUTHOR OF THIS BLOG, AND IT IS THEREFORE BEING CENSORED.

THAT IS AN EXTREMELY UNFAIR THING THAT HAPPENS IN THE WORLD OF JOURNALISM AND COMMUNICATIONS: NOTHING THAT DISPLEASES THE OWNER OF THE NETWORK, I MEAN BLOG, IS ALLOWED TO BE AIRED.

WELL, WHO SAID LIFE IS FAIR? OUR CURRENT WRITER WILL BE FIRED AND PROSECUTED, AND THE PUBLIC WILL PAY THE PRICE OF THIS GREED WITH IGNORANCE!!!! MUAHAHAHAH!

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Snow! That too!

I just finished reading the text I wrote about scary movies... I love being able to laugh at myself.

Anyway, the whole scary movie thing reminded me of another scary thing that happened when I was trying to get home from Dean's house, back in the days I'd go back to sleep over at a friend's in New Haven, instead of staying over in MA.

(Hey, Dean baby, I know you like to read my blog, so you'll remember this story).

It was time to go home, and then the old discussion was taking place:

"It is really late. You know you can stay over, right?"

"Are you out of your mind?! What is my mother going to say if she finds out I slept over at a guy's house! WHOA, at my boyfriend's house! That's even worse!"

"It is snowing, I'm sure she'll understand. Doesn't your mother trust you?"

"No, that's not the point. that, uh, it is not the ... point. it is just wrong. it is, you don't, you don't do that. You don't sleep over at a man's house, if you're a woman. Especially if the man is your boyfriend. You don't do that. My whole family will freak out."

(Back then Dean did not have the bad habit of calling me OLD, taht's why I said "woman", not "girl". And hey, old is your mother by the way. I'm a girl)

Well, we went on and on, and as usual I am repeating the same argument over and over again, bc... I am very good at repeating my arguments when I have nothing else to back them up with.
And finally, "let me just get out of here, before the snow gets too thick."

That was back in the days I could not figure out how to defog my windows. Neither could the reall onwers of the car. They still can't figure out their own cars. So, I used to drive with the window down, till my friend Bill figured that out for me.

And I called Bill just to let him aware I was driving to his place to spend the night. "there's a lot of snow here, so if I don't make it in 2 hours, call the police please."

Bill is ... married. And I am also friends with his wife. And they have a guest room. I usually sleep over at their place when I need to stay in New Haven overnight.

Well, back to the story - I made it to the first toll booth, and kept on driving. Window open just a little bit, bc the snow was really falling.... and guess what... I could not see a thing. Well, I could see one thing: WHITE! Everything around me was white. The road, the side of the road, the grass... everything... and I hadn't smoked anything weird that night, I wasn't high or anything.

Oh, wait, if everything is white... how do I know I am even on the road? That question startled me. Where am I? Where I am going? Where do I come from? oh! ...no... not that one... I know where I'm coming from!

I started driving really slow..., so slow that a plow truck began to honk behind me. "Run me over , freak, I am not moving out of the way!" Well, he did not run me over... but he did pass me.

Well, enough is enough. pulled over, (i think I pulled over), put emergency lights on, got on the phone.

"Dean! COME AND RESCUE ME! I can't drive, I can't see, I can't go anywhere."

"... ok... where are you?"

"I am!... i... i... I DON'T KNOW!!!!!!! Everything is white!"

"... Ok... now... how far away are you?"

"i,i,i,i got past the ... thingy! the ticket booth! the first one, I'm somewhere on... I-90. It's all white! I pulled over, I have my emergency lights on, I'm freaking out, I'm not moving out of here! COME AND RESCUE ME!"

"How far on I 90, baby? which exit?"

"ME NOT KNOW! it is all white! no signs, only white snow falling. Are you coming?"

"All right, can you keep moving the car, out of the road, to an exit?"

"I guess I can try. Are you coming? Are you coming? Are you coming?"

"I am, just get to an exit and call me and tell me where you are. "

"Ok, but please come, leave the house, now, and I will call you, and please answer your phone from the road."

I started moving the car, emergency lights on, and hey! I had gone as far as the toll booth to I-91! What do you know!
I handed the ticket to the booth person and went like, very seriously, "can I please stop somewhere? Because... my boyfriend ... is uh, coming to rescue me." Then I realized how funny that sounded and smiled. Guy smiled back probably thinking I was crazy,and pointed towards an employee's parking lot. Oh, am I fancy.

Dean arrives a few minutes later. I of course made my best "mommy, me got in trouble"-face, and said, "can I stay over at your place tonight? I am sure my family will understand."

The catch is - I never really left his house again. I would just stay over on weekends.

Wow, doesn't Paul McCartney (my real boyfriend... cuz Dean is just a cover up) have a similar story with his gf Jane? And he never left her house again... well, till they broke up. They broke up bc he was secretly in love with me. Even though I wasn't born yet. Never mind the fact that he recently married that crippled one-legged model, what's her face? He is still in love with me. He only married her bc I refused to move to Liverpool with him. It is true.

Monday, March 13, 2006

Scary Movies Aren't Real

OK!!! Scary movies aren't real! Can someone put that in my mind? It is not easy to convince this child. And it is getting harder. But see, what happens is that they are simply coming to life after I watch them.

There was this one time that I was over at Dean's, and we bought "The Exorcism of Mary Rose" to watch. In the movie there is something very freaky about the time 3 a.m. it is suposed to be the time of the devil. Well, ok. Who is awake at 3 am anyway? I never go that late.

Well, on that one night when we watched the movie, I was putting off driving back home (what else is new?) . That was the weekend of the huge blizzard. So, Dean drove me back to my car, that was in parking lot in Hamden. Well, my car was covered in snow. It took us a good half hour or more, at around 1 in the morning, to dig it out.

As usual, I was having a blast. "That's so cool! I am having so much fun! We should do this more often!"

Dean was not as excited. "Not at 1 in the morning. I still have to drive back home." Well, so? So did I.

After digging out my car, I drove home. The road was fine, but the streets in the city were awful, especially the ones closer to my house. My street had turned into a river of snow and there was no place to park.

It was around 2:50 a.m. . I began to freak out. "Darn! I want to be asleep by 3 a.m.!"

I obviously called Dean right away. He had been on the phone with me throughout the drive, so I'd not fall asleep> I called him again and asked him to stay on the line cuz I was so freaking scared.

I finally found a place to park... all the way down the street... at the corner... . And when I turned off the car and opened the door to get out, it was exaclty 3 a.m. And I still had to walk all the way back home in the middle of the snow, with a backpack on. The snow of course made everything look not so dark. "That's good!" you'd think. No, that's not good. That made things look even freakier.

Huge sigh. "Ok, I am a Christian, I have the Spirit of God, the devil can do me no harm. Besides," I kept repeating to myself "it is only a movie. There is not such athing as the devil 's time."

Well, I made it home. And only when I was in bed I hung up the phone. And put on that eye thingy so I'd not be tempted to look at the window.

Now, let's move a few weeks forward. Yesterday we went to the movies to watch "The Hills Have Eyes". Dean and I and a friend of his and his gf. According to Dean, "They say it is the scariest movie ever." I thought to myself, "it better be good. it better be freaking good. For anyone to make this kind of advertising, it better be freaking ridiculously good." And told him "It better make me really scared. That's too bold a claim to make."

Guess what - it is freaking good. The movie keeps you on your edge all the time. You better like strong emotions. Come on! I've watched scary movies my whole life. And I was single my whole life. I never needed anyone to hold on to. Yesterday I thanked God I had my boyfriend, bc I was so freaking scared!

Ok, Dean, if you are reading this - yes i do scream on scary movies, BUT I DON'T USUALLY CRY ON THEM!!!!!!!! No, not crying. I did cry on this movie. And it had nothing to do with my not being able to take food in.

Alright. Time to drive back home. After a while, right around where I-91 and Rt-15 meet, I begin to feel sleepy, so I get off the road to buy a caffeine drink at a gas station. It is around midnight, and I am not sure how to get back on Rt 15. Hey... what - else - is - new?

The gas station seems pretty busy. I leave my car unlocked, and walk into the store. Walk around for a few minutes, "drink, dr-ink, drink..... No drink?!? Freaking store!"

Then I look around, there's no one else left there but me. "Have I been here that long?" I go to the cashier. "Sir, please, how do I get back on Rt 15?"

He gives me a reply I can not understand. "Is he a foreigner?" I wonder.

I rephrase my question using I-91. Still can't understand his words, but I figure he is saying nothing of use.

"Can you please repeat that? I can't understand you."

As I take a good look at him to better decypher his words, My heart comes to a halt. He looks exactly like the gas station guy from the movie, the one that started the whole freaking nightmare!

Then I realized he can speak no English and keeps repeating words like "I new here, don't know".

Gr-eat, how close can this get to the story? only guy, ungly as hell, no info. Chivers up and down my spine.

"Thankyousirhaveagoodnight"

I rush out the store back to my car, the only car left.

"Holy s***!"

As I rush to open the car door, I remember to check the back seat. "Back seat! Back seat! Ok! good!" Keys, gear, pedal, adrenaline flowing freely in my blood circulation.

And the fog! Ok! two movies now! "The Fog" too. The fog on that night was so thick I could not see 2 yards ahead. "Please, God, let no one be hiding behind this fog. No weirdoes, no freaks of nature, no real or unreal creatures of darkness, none of these. Please. I'm from Brazil, I'm daughter of Guarani indians and African slaves, my ancestors never killed anyone. Ok, there is some Spanish, Portuguese and Dutch blood in my family, but we don't really like them."

As I pull out of that freaky gas station I see my salvation - another gas station across the street! A police officer at the store door, sipping some hot coffee! Aleluia!!!! I exchange some words with the police officer and go into the store. No caffeine drink. But some sugar-rich food like chocolate will do the trick.

Back in the car (not before cheking the back seat), the cop wishes me a good drive and the feeling of being back to the real world was the most comforting thing ever.

Scary movies, though, are still my favorite thing.

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Spiced Chicken Sandwich

The TV commercial for the new McDonald's Chicken Spiced Sandwich is histerical.
And it really made me wanna try it.
Next time I go out with Dean, we gotta do fast food.

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Fear of the Dark

Fear of the Dark is a cool movie.
It is a scary movie, but if you're not a fan of the genre don't discard it. It appeasl a lot to our childhood.
It deals with a little boy's fear of the dark. He sees things that are not there in the light. Shades, shadows, shapes. Just like we all do. But we do know that it is our imagination that turns those shapes, shades and shaddows into living creatures.
In the movie they are real. The dark exists as an entity, as a different world. Our belief gives it power.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

super hero

So I definetely like to write down my dreams... erh, the cool ones at least.

Last night I was super hero. You know one of those cool modern ones, more like an improved version of 007, like Kim Possible, or those teenagers from Totally Spies, with cute cell phones with super commands, and power glitter on my lips (the Diamond Shine from Loreal), cool hair-dos (the ones I try out in front of the mirror), and really cool outfits!

I was part of a team with 3 other girls. One of them was Samara (a crazy girl from my church in Brazil), but I don't remember who the other two were. One was possibly Luana (my best friend); and the other one I have not a clue, but she was really blond (no judgements please) and I know she was friends with Jim's girlfriend (a guy from my church in CT).

My brother Leo was our boss. He'd contact us via cell phone. And our cell phones would vibrate and send some sort of glittering light that would give us our super powers.

One Sunday after church we got a lead on a major crime we were trying to solve. My brother paged us and we got ready to hurry to the place in our super (guess what color) shiny pink convertible. But the blond girl had plans for lunch.
"Oh, I'm totally not coming today." She sounded as if I had called her to something as insignificant as coming over to watch a DVD.
"What do you mean you're not coming?"
"well, you know, my girl friend and her boyfriend are taking me out for lunch at this very cool place."
Want to see Vee mad? Remember school team work? Remember that kid that could never come for the meetings bc he was going away for the weekend with mommy and daddy and on the day of the presentation he'd want us to tell the teacher he participated and we, stupid as we were, said he did participate? That kid was the one I was just talking to. Or at least I was telling her everything I always wanted to tell that kid and never had the guts to do it. Yelling as loud and mean as I always wanted.
"WHAT ABOUT YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES FOR CHRISSAKE! we're a team for crying out loud! You can't just not come."
Answer came in abored voice:
"ah... can we do it later?"
I could feel blood going up my head. Got bossy as usual, let her do whatever she wanted, and went back to the other girls:
"She is out of the team. This just can't go on. She's out. I want her out. Period!"

So Jim happened to walk by. He probably noticed by our oufit that we were in some sort of mission and asked what was going on.
I sounded as serious and annoyed as I could:
"We are going to save the world. That girl, friend's with your girlfreind, she's the most shallow girl I've ever seen!"

"She is?"

"You should not let her hang out with you. She could care less! You know what she told me? That she could not come on our mission bc she was going for dinner with her best friend and her cool boyfriend! She is ridiculous!"

Cool boyfriend? ... she did not say that. Maybe I shouldn't have either. He was half serious half laughing. I'd be glad if someone said he was hanging out with me cuz I was cool. Who cares about saving the world?

"well, why don't you just kick her out of the team?"
Ok, analizing intentions in a dream - was he trying to help or glad the girl thought he was cool?
He seemed pretty amused with the whole situation, but not as if he thought I was nuts or anything (all that super hero talk in the real world would be enough for someone to lock me up). It more as if he was watching a movie.

"Arh! I don't know. I guess I'm just stupid. " heck-what-I-am-going-to-do-now look in my face. All of a sudden I managed, "We need a driver. How would you like to save the world for a day? It is really dangerous though. You totally don't have to, if you're afraid."

As crazy as it may seem, he agreed to it. Yeah, how many times does one get the chance of becoming a superhero for a day?

So there we went in our shiny pink car cruising down the road. Palm trees along side. ... some girl I know was on top of one of them playing a banjo. OK, that was just weird. But we were too busy trying to save the world you know... looking serious. We were girls in a mission.

I don't remember what the mission was though. Some bad guy, some little kids in trouble, Steven Spielberg type of stuff.

But, yeah, the last scene I remember I rather keep to myself.

It was good dreaming I was a cool looking super hero, with cool looking gadgets, a cool looking team, and a cool looking driver!