getting married, having children... children???

All of my childhood friends are now married (some divorced, it's true, but they have been married). Many of them are even having children already!

Well, it's a weird thought, you know. Because when I think of us , I think of us as children. Because we've known each other as children. And then, all of a sudden, what happened? We're all married! Heads of household, housewives...

And then some of us have babies of their own??? Babies???

Ok, call me selfish, but I don't think I want a baby in my life anytime soon. I don't. I just don't. I have been an au pair, a nanny, a baby-sitter. So don't take me wrong. I love children. Children are fun. But do I want one of my own?

Do you know what that means? To have a baby of your own? DO you really know what that means?

Well, first, it means that my tummy will grow. I will look ugly!!! Then, if I am not lucky, my tummy will forever have stretch marks and it will be saggy.

Then there's childbirth. I am scared to death of having a baby come out of my body. TO DEATH!!! It must hurt like hell! And I am not a very good person when it comes to dealing with pain. Ask Dean, my husband. He often tries to squeeze my pimples. Believe me, I put on a heck of a show when he tries to squeeze my pimples.

Then there's raising the dang thing. Yeah! You have to raise them!!! It's not just popping the thing out of your body and give it a name! You have to raise the freaking thing! And it's not like you raise them for 18 years and send them off into the world. No!!! They will come back to haunt you. I know that. Ask my mom. Ask my parents-in-law. In Brazil we say "Raised children, double trouble."

Besides, they are expensive, those munchkins! They need clothing, and food, and toys. Then there's doctors visits and medicine. Then there's lessons - music, sports, etc. Then, don't forget the fact that they are going to be paying passengers every time we want to get on an airplane.

Sometimes I think, "Boy, I really want children. I really want a little munchkin to go out in the snow with me and play. We'd laugh and push each other around... Dean and I would be so happy if we had little miniature us to tease..." Then I think of the responsibility. Then I think we will be stuck with them for the rest of our (or their) lives. That's when those dreamy desires of snow-playing children suddenly vanish.